So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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