If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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