Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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