Yo dont text me then not text me
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
