thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
