i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
