Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize