let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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