We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize