Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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