I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
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