Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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