Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
