I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I'm jealous of your bromance
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
