im gay
i know
yea but for you.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
