but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
