I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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