Yo dont text me then not text me
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Randomize
