Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I wear drunk well.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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