I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
