I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
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