I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Shame is for Republicans.
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