smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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