I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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