i permit you to call me
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
