I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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