big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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