I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?