bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
We need a shit load of segways right now
They are going to name an STD after you.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
