I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize