Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
