my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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