i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
