She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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