I love having hate sex.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
porn star boner night. come get it.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
