i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
You made out with two different species that night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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