Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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