just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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