wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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