Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Randomize
