I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
