That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Randomize