I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize