mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize