i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Randomize
