So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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