Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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