We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
