You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
