So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
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I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I will be naked everywhere
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
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I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole