suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Randomize
